2012年5月7日月曜日

- Past childhood diary (Mother-of-two shot photo) -

So were my mother is to take
 My mother and I have photos together-is reflected in the
 Is not much

, Memory has been "hug" is quite! I did not (^ ^;;
 I was able to find, some photos, the photos that are hug-a mother




Photo that is reflected in the mother
 Really, is not much



・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

> "Photos that are tiger tiger pose"-the mother
 Mother is retrieve the photographs was very pain-·

 And time became teenagers.
 Every time there is a chance to see my mother, said photos and anti-
 · "My mother was at that time I might ear, the larger, photo, said:? Will become memories? Would say" and said it was
 At the time,,,
"Yeah .., I became memories Yeah. Said," and only-I, did not say
 > Dysfunctional family
I say about the true feelings, and the other, the function and probably did not
  from becoming adult, yes, even my mother asked. An extension of time in a long time, was continued, the "words" of the other, can be said, there was no,,,



Mother, why
 What took a lot, a photo and said,,,
 In a swimsuit, the "bikini" morbid about, what stuck,,,



 And my father, why
 
 
> Now,,, in the "principal point perspectives and their own" Mo, the route is, not visible from,,, (another article)
 http://ameblo.jp/buraiai/entry-11229898844.html
 It
• When my brother-in secret does not stay in my father-
Came to take photographs was a picture-my-
 
Photography is less than 10 sheets in total,
 But I was about 10 years old nude swimsuit-all-or-
 They are almost-was just "photo was taken-to-mother-is-a-pose to take my mother" -,,,
 > Is the all-bikini

 I said, "I wanted to believe, the people"-
 I wanted to despair and to human,,,
 
*****************************
 
> Photo-diary childhood past
 Childhood, today, once, and then exit

 From the next
> Photo-diary past elementary school
  to migrate here,

The boundary age of 10, (one year of an unspecified number of sexual abuse. Number of from the age-specific ← 10)
 · Overeating
- Leakage of urine
 • The nearly-tall, growth no longer
 Photos and childhood, and if it is possible compare, I think

 And, photos and elementary school
 Such as photographs "weight gain, overeating"-era photos of junior high school
 > Overeating
And if it is possible compare, them, I think,,,
 
*****************************
 
was surprised when I saw this photo,,,,

 · • What I do not know "who was taken-"
 This was spent in-place "from a year-at the age of 10" at the maternal-,,,

 To very complicated feelings, to "(Photos) expression" own-
 Now even if Motte, It should be noted that,, I,,,
 
 
> Desi 154cm (o `· ω ·)!! About 82 km de ━ d (· ω ·` o) ━ ☆ Star
 http://ameblo.jp/buraiai/entry-11100210174.html
 Word of resentment to his father and mother a request from the home visiting teacher of psychic chastisement occasionally be a time to be mischievous pranks are their grandfather to go to school bullying ​​→ → The toilet occasionally bullied from school → → go to school to sleep

  was "a year-at the age of 10"-like,,,

 -Stuffed
  other than infant age, photos have a "stuffed", so I did not have one-piece,,, this photo is, so, I myself, felt that "strange",,, very, There is no sense in feeling bad, being felt, is a picture,,,
 
 
> Paralysis of the face? Facial neuralgia? > I do not know-so-disease have never been to the hospital-
 http://ameblo.jp/buraiai/entry-10884137224.html
 At the age of 10
Repeated sexual abuse within-the-job or
> Face paralysis? Now
 -Eyelid
-Mouth


 > Tobioriro from the second floor and the knife-and-4 Baba brothers and their mother, Jiji and! Daisakusen! • When drunken episode? Is
http://ameblo.jp/buraiai/entry-11127166755.html
  room was "room" of the photo above, had their mother-reared childhood-
 
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
 
>-Generalhttp://ameblo.jp/buraiai/entry-10512433704.html★ ★ faceMr. Keiji Goto, a lawyer of 50 police officials aim to eradicate child pornography from @☆ there is an unforgettable experience. 1998 was working on Internet crime in the Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department. Was referred to sarcastically as "a brave person who came in from a superpower that child pornography" from the moderator, at a meeting of the (ICPO) International Criminal Police Organization was held in France. And Japan at the time such images covering the eyes and there is no law to regulate child pornography had been leaked all over the world. Lowering the head-to investigation officials "sorry" in each country was enough to do. Seemed inadequate regulatory Law for Punishing Acts Related to Child Prostitution and Child Pornography of enforcement of the following year. Wound of the heart-child of the subject can not say a lifetime. "Why does Japan insensitive to pain of the children why this much" jumped out, police organizations and 2005. I passed the bar exam during his tenure of 92 years. "I wanted familiar with the law." Faced with law book on holiday or when commuting. 33-year-old. Was passed in the fourth challenge. Tensin was after flying to petition to lawmakers, such as asking for the prohibition of simple possession of child pornography, a lawyer. At the end of March was also formed group 0 lawyer role. "Child pornography is child abuse itself." Belief does not change.(Tomitokoro Kosuke Sasaki, Noriaki social unit shooting)

> Overcome extremes-Adult ChildrenStill, digested, and he must overcome, I think,,,
This is, data of oneAs will be one sample,,,
Right now the children, are suffering from bullying and abuse, as we will be saved even a little,,,
Everyone for Adult Children should be noted that even now suffering, as we will be saved even a little,,,
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

This, once> Photo of childhood isYou have to return to the mother-(^ ^;;Itself ↑ I, photo of yourself, Waruku~tsu feelings, so I do not want to have (^ ^;;
In feeling, if there is a photoAbsolutely, as they said cornered in (^ ^;;Laugh ☆ (Gyafun spirit, I do not calm down
・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・
 
>-過去日記・幼少時代-( 写真・母との・ツーショット )-
>母に・「 ポーズを・取らされて・撮られる写真 」
母が・写真を取り出すことが・とても・苦痛でした

そして、中高生になったころ。
母は・こういった写真を、見る機会があるたびに
・母・「 当時は・いやだったかも知れないけど、大きくなると、こういった写真は・いいだろ?思い出になっただろ? 」と、言いました
当時は、、、
・私・「 ・・・うん、そうだね。いい思い出になったね 」としか、言えませんでした
>機能不全家族
本心を言えるほど、もう、機能はしていなかったのだろうと思います
   ↑大人になってからも、母にそう、聞かれても。長い時間の延長線上、ほかの「 言葉 」を・継続した時間の中では、いえることは、ありませんでした、、、

なぜ、母が
こういった写真を、たくさん撮ったのか、、、
水着では、病的なほど、「 ビキニ 」に、こだわったのか、、、

そして、なぜ、父が

>さあ、、、もう・「 自分視点・主点 」での、ルートは、見えていないから、、、( 別記事 )
それは
父が・私に内緒で・私が居ない時に・弟が
私の・写真を・取りに来た・写真でした
その・写真は・全部で10枚足らず
けれど・10歳くらいの私は・全て・水着か・全裸でした
それらは・ほとんどが・「 母に・ポーズを・取らされて・母に・取られた・写真 」ばかりでした、、、
>全て・ビキニです
私は・「 人を・信じてみたかった 」
そして・人に・絶望したかった、、、

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