- Past childhood diary -

http://123.sub.jp/kako/
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Memories of elementary school prior to admission.
（20060725）

I did like cicada and birds, creatures.
In the summer I went to take a semi-local to the shrine well.
Days of that summer, I went to take a semi-three people and my brother and cousin.

And go on relying on the buzz of a cicada, had stopped the cicada singing big tree in the back of the public eye is difficult with Kagura.
In the height of children, not very reach.
But we absolutely Hoshiku~tsu. Out without giving up.

I looked around and saw suddenly, more of a vagrant who was standing in the shade of Kagura.

Did you ask because I was not a timid personality, and lack of vigilance Why "Uncle,! That catching cicada" and.
That person "instead of catching up, you just come over here" was said to rise slowly.

I remember something very have a bad feeling.
Could not be denied or why, though.
S not because I wanted a semi, would hurt that person is to vague it is made ​​from.

Prompting from Kagura and swing away toward that person and remove the candy from his pocket and held out their hands dirty to my brother, "You guys are a little Aida, please go to the other side," and me of Kagura I took the back towards the cliff.

That is made, I remember clearly.
The reason I remember is because the head and burned strongly aware "never forget this thing."

What these do not remember why, but since it was felt instinctively and "I absolutely can not forget."
Remember that on a piecemeal basis, the movement of my hand and that person's hand movements.
Like a movie scene, as the picture that remains as Taningoto somewhere is the number of 10 seconds of video.

We are not responsible for their content difference.
The request was inspired.

Is that made ​​me leave until that person is said to die as well move my hands according to the movement of the hand down the zipper of pants, that person to be told.

Exhausted after that person, I was freed.
It seems to have said that 2 to 3 something, it does not remember.

Because no human eye can see that.
I could not see the human eye, it was the first moment.
I ran to the swing while pretending to be calm to children behind without a backward glance, as much as possible, waiting for our brother, we arrived to go home and then to flee.
Although I was asked innocently say to us that like his brother? "Did you got candy" was the utmost to put on a brave face.

I remember that the children did not know the meaning to heart, and "not supposed talk to anyone" "not supposed known to the parent", was just scared.

I was scared also be purely angry parent.
Other than that, but I remember that I was scared something bad, but now I was afraid what the hell do not remember.

Leave can not consult anyone go up to junior high school near seven years, was trembling in fear and then only in a human.

Until you are able to understand what are they have it, the sleepless nights whenever fever, whenever the body is of Arc, and "What if I died because of the white liquid at that time", repeated time and again beneath. Also looks like it can be expected to "sperm" is it, it was still scary for a while.
"If, if I was sick of trying and" Other. "If it were diseases such as die, what can I do" and.
Also had to touch my white liquid, and if I died trying,,, I was scared.

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Honestly,,,

Be reread,,,
> You can not,,,

If true,,,
Now as an adult, to this,,,
-Like-that the "? Remarks"
I think, also, if possible,

Once-and-After digestion gradually

I,,,
Now

> To "reprint" seems to be the fullest,,,,

His past
> To read

Themselves,,,
>> Well,,,, it knows it has been "rejected",,,

> Second rape
"Fear"-that,,,

Still,,, I think,,,
Negative legacy,,,
Negative chain,,,

As we will, are saved, even a little-children-are suffering from bullying and abuse-in now,,,
dult Children of everyone-is suffering, still,,, as we will, are saved, even a little,,,
 ↑a "word"-this,,, determination? But, now that his go-repeatedly-seems to be the fullest,,,,

But, properly,,,
I-digested, and he must overcome,,,
Until now, even his own
Did not reflect his own thing,,,,

I think face to face, Chant, and digested, and he must overcome,,,

But if this data and one-
If you do Sul and one sample,,,
> Looking fair,,,

Mother
Blog view from the side of mother,,,
"You"-to go to the public

Blog of the mother,,, if you stand up to the time-frame of my mother going to write,,,,
Even more, I,, give it a compromise, and their own mental
I'm going to digest,,,,

Quit-that Hikikomoru
If you move,,,
For better or worse,,, recoil-that will come bouncing back to you,,,,

It also, to prepare
I stopped, because that Hikikomoru,,,
Themselves, in order to go on,,,

And,,,
In the real sense,,, compromise,,,
When you meet with forgiveness,,, I think,,,

For example,,,
> "Parricide"
Also was the last time, such as
And published all trying,,,

Leave,,, leave it there,,,
It,,,
> Data

• The data I
Whatever it is, work,,,
From childhood, has been helped,,,

Also, it returns the data that,,,
Will? "Thank",,, but benefited from data-in,,,